“I still remember the days I prayed for the things I have now.”
Seems like it was just yesterday that I would have done ANYTHING to hold my babies on Mother’s Day. I will never forget how painful it felt to have empty arms when I just knew I was meant to be a Mama. But ya know what? As crazy as it seems, now I am thankful for those days because they shaped me into the Mom (and person) I was always intended to be.
Even when I’ve got two babies who are sick and fussy, I am grateful. When I wake up every hour through the night, I am grateful. When there’s a double meltdown at the grocery store, I am grateful. When my arms are tired and my back is sore from holding a baby all day, I am grateful. When I can’t remember the last time I showered or brushed my teeth, I am grateful. (Yeah…I know, I really gotta do something to keep my hygiene in check!) I will always be grateful because I know that not having a baby is so much more difficult that having one. I know that infertility is so much more exhausting than a baby. And I know that being a mom is one of life’s greatest privileges that some woman are still waiting on.
People always ask me if it’s hard to raise to two babies so close in age and I always say, “Yes, but it’s not nearly as difficult as struggling with infertility.” So thanks infertility for giving me that perspective and the teaching me the power of perseverance.
If you are in the middle of a struggle, continue to have faith and don’t give up. Your day will come, I promise, and when it does it’ll be even more extraordinary than you can imagine. For reasons I’ll never quite know, I just had to walk that difficult road to find my babies. And for reasons I’ll never question, I’d do it all again. In a heartbeat. And someday you’ll say the exact same thing.