Written by Alana Wilson, Guest Blogger
When my husband and I first started dating, we discussed our goals for the future and both agreed that we wanted to one day have children of our own and raise a family together. The journey to do this isn’t over yet, but it has been a crazy and wild ride so far just getting our first child. (We are hoping for 1-2 more children, but are grateful for whatever God gives us!)
Let me give you a little background on me first.
So, If you don’t know me, which most of you don’t, I struggle with mental health problems and always have. They are worsened by hormones naturally in my body and artificial ones such as in birth control. I started showing some struggles at an early age and after seeing several doctors during my childhood, I was able to get diagnosed and find the perfect mixtures of medications to reduce most my symptoms. I have an anxiety disorder, mild bipolar II, bouts of depression at times (in the last several years though I haven’t had any), and some OCD tendencies.
I was very little and skinny in my teens and I didn’t get my first period until summer before my 17th birthday. Originally because of this and in fear of damaging my reproductive system, with the help of my parents, I tried hard to gain weight as well as began birth control to regulate my cycle. The first pills I tried made me cry, the depoprovera shot made me manic, and nuvaring just never stayed where it should have. I ended up on the mini pill which is less hormones for a few years with less side effects than the others, but I did still have a few. PMS was awful, I was super emotional, migraines came on like clockwork before and after each period and I was basically bedridden the first 24 hours of my period each month.
I have known since I was a young girl that the one thing I wanted in life was to be a mom. I didn’t know who would father my children, but I had set out to find him from a young age. I had no idea what my journey to mommyhood would entail, but it has all been worth it.
When I was 22, I thought I found the man meant to be the daddy to my kids. I was wrong and a miscarriage of twins that October after my 23rdbirthday is what showed me his true colors and that he wasn’t meant to be my forever or the father of my kids. I tried dating here and there for a few more years and never felt anyone was the one until I met my husband a few months before my 26thbirthday. We met on an iPhone Dating App while living almost 100 miles apart from one another because I spotted his picture in a Hockey Uniform and the rest is history!
It was love at first sight and I JUST knew. (He knew I was “The One” too apparently because he called his mama on the way home from our first date to tell her he was gonna marry me one day and he did even though it took 6 years!)
After I had been dating Cory for over a year, we came to the conclusion that the birth control wasn’t helping me at all, and causing more harm than good; it made me cry easier, moody, and my cycle was off a lot of the time. We discussed me getting the copper IUD because it has no hormones and has seemingly good reviews. We knew that we wanted kids though in less than the 10 years the IUD is good for and didn’t want me to have to deal with the pain of insertion and removal in a short period of time. We ultimately decided that we would use natural family planning and pull-out method as back up. (FYI: I do not recommend pull-out for anyone – especially as only form of birth control! It is risky and not proven to be effective, but it worked for us!) This “method of birth control” worked for us for over 5 years and after our wedding in April 2017 we actually began to discuss trying to conceive.
We started “parenting” by adopting a doxie named Buster and seeing him with Cory (and our friends human kids) confirmed to me he would make an amazing father one day!
We began trying a few months after we got married. Basically we pulled the goalie if you know what I mean…Nothing happened and the following January (9 months after we got married) we began using an AVA bracelet, ovulation tests, tracking my cycle and getting a general idea of when I would ovulate on a cycle tracker app. We tried different TTC methods such as SMTE and every other day during fertile window and more tricks of the trade like elevated hips, using Preseed, and taking supplements to improve our reproductive health. 6 months into trying we began working with my OBGYN (who I love and am so grateful for!) and he did a work up on both of us. He told us that tests showed some issues with both of us that could make it difficult, but to keep trying another 6 months and we would address it again.
6 months went by and we ran some repeats of some tests, and were surprised when we finally got a positive pregnancy test 2 days before my birthday October 7, 2018. Sadly on my birthday, October 9th, I began bleeding and when I saw the doctor they diagnosed it as a chemical pregnancy or missed miscarriage. We were devastated, but also had glimpse of hope that maybe just maybe we could conceive again. In early January 2019 after nothing had happened again, we made an appointment with a highly recommended local fertility clinic. We went to see them at the end of January and an ultrasound confirmed I was getting ready to ovulate. At the same appointment, they went over our history with us, we gave them our medical records, and they told us based on everything including how long we had been trying we would most need IVF (in-vitro fertilization) to get pregnant because we had a 1% chance of conceiving naturally. It was difficult to process and we decided to return to everyday life and thinking about how we would go about affording it. Luckily Cory’s health insurance at the time covered one cycle, but it would still be expensive. Two weeks later, the night before Cory was scheduled to have his gallbladder removed, I threw up my late lunch at work and was over come by extreme nausea due to smells in the break room in my office. I figured it had to be all in my head, but four, yes four, pregnancy tests confirmed I was already pregnant!
Just as it brought us together, We announced with a (LA KINGS) Hockey theme! Our little hockey family was growing!
My bloodwork was coming back perfect and rising like it should. We saw the little bean at 6 weeks with a fluttering heart that made both of ours melt. Baby was growing and so was my tummy!
I was overjoyed my dreams of being a mommy were coming true!
We found out at 11 weeks we were expecting a baby GIRL!
My due date was also crazy and amazing – October 31st 2019. Rainbow Baby Month and the Month I lost two pregnancies before! Not only that, but My grandpa passed away shortly after my wedding and told me one day I would make an amazing mother and his birthday was in October as well as mine, my grandma’s, my father-in law’s, my aunt’s, and my grandparent’s anniversary!
My only real complication was that I suffered from the worst itching from a condition known as Cholestasis of Pregnancy or ICP. (Looking back I swear having ICP was way worse than even my delivery and recovery!)
We scheduled my C-Section for 10/18/2019 which was my dear grandma’s 93rd birthday.
Baby girl had other plans and wanted her own birthday apparently!
My water broke on its own on the afternoon of October 15th, at 330pm. We raced to the hospital where they confirmed it and in the blink of an eye I was prepped for surgery with my husband and mom by my side.
Kelia Linei Wilson was born at 37 weeks gestation on October 15, 2019 at 8:21pm. Kelia means strong beauty in Hawaiian. She was 6lbs 10oz and 19.5in long. She had some curls of peach fuzz hair and was/still is her daddy’s mini-me.